My Heart is a Chainsaw
A social outcast obsessed with slasher movies gets the gift of a lifetime- an actual slasher unfolding right in front of her. As she watches the chaos unfold in front of her, she uses her trivial knowledge of the slasher genre to save the town, only to realize that life is not a movie…
Stephen Graham Jones.
A name I will not be soon forgetting.
Though I have only read a couple of his books so far, I plan on devouring his work like I devour Hostess orange cupcakes.
And I’m fat as hell, brother.
I have already written about The Only Good Indians, the first of Jones’s books I had read. Today, we are here to discuss My Heart is a Chainsaw, a love-letter of a book to the slasher genre. After having read TOGI, I was eager to find the next book of his to read- and My Heart happened to have just come out at the time I started looking. I read a quick synopsis of the story, and I was hooked.
My Heart is a Chainsaw is the story of Jade, a social outcast OBSESSED with slasher movies, trying to survive small-town life long enough to graduate and hit the road. She is chock-full of slasher trivia and knowledge, to the point that she lives and breathes the stuff. That is- until a real life slasher begins to unfold right before her eyes. As bodies begin piling up around her in her small town, she recognizes all the tell-tale signs immediately:
The initial sacrifice.
The final girl, popular and new to town.
The clueless sheriff.
As she attempts to warn people of the impending blood that is soon to spill, she knows that- just like in the movies- nobody will listen to her pleas. And just like in the movies, the body count is set to quickly peak before the final reveal. But for her, this isn’t a movie, and she cannot just close her eyes during this scene.
I loved so many aspects of this book. I am a huge fan of horror movies and slashers (maybe you could tell), but my god Jones knew what he was talking about when he penned this bad boy. There is a list of almost 200 movie references made within the book. I now have to add at least 120 of them to my list of movies to watch (thanks a lot, Stephen). Jones encompasses the thrill and gore of the slasher genre within the book- but he did so much more as well. He pulls readers in with a relatable protagonist (who hasn’t pretended to be in a slasher film and planned there moves accordingly?) whom we are all rooting for. He provides readers all the tropes found in slasher movies, but fleshes them out more than most movies have the opportunity to. But what he does very well is build up the whole ‘whodunnit’ aspect of the slasher genre that often gets overlooked. As readers of MHIAC, we are left wondering who is at the bottom of this Scooby Doo mystery until the big reveal.
The only minor comment I had was the ending of the book. It leaves off on, not quite a cliff-hanger, but something similar. Things are falling apart around Jade, and we come to the end of the novel with her doing her best to survive everything- only to be met with more chaos. And though I appreciate the symbolism of the last scene (no spoilers here, folks), it left me wanting more. But hey, I guess that’s what has me on the hook for the next book in the series.
Rating: I give this book 13 kitchen knives out of 10. It is easy to read, well written, chock-full of fun and horror, and leaves you trying to solve the case at the same rate as Jade.
If you are looking for a movie in the same vein, any slasher in the 80’s will do. My go to favorites are always Nightmare on Elm Street and Halloween. Both have had many movies made in the franchise, including some remakes, so literally dealer’s choice. You can also check out Sleepaway Camp if you are looking for a good whatthefuck moment (seriously though, whathefuck). You can also check out Scream 5, which came out recently in 2022. It was the first movie in the franchise made since Wes Craven died, but the team did great with it.
As far as books are concerned, The Only Good Indians is a good place to start. Jones knocks that shit out of the park. You can also check out The Final Girl Support Group by Grady Hendrix, an ode to the ‘final girl’ found throughout the slasher genre. It delves into the question ‘what happens to the final girl after the dust (or blood) settles?’ Hendrix also wrote My Best Friend’s Exorcist, a fun mix of 90’s nostalgia and The Exorcist. Both are great authors putting out great work currently, so be sure to check them out.
How long do you think you would last in a slasher? Cause I know ya boi would be dead pretty fucken early. And it would be dumb as hell.
Until next time…
-M